[::..My Family..::]
When my new found cousin left me a message in the cbox, i was quite shocked. My blog was an unknown. Known only to those in the dark side! hehe. And read only by people from the dark side, coz the contents, are rather dark sometimes. Mostly, my useless rants and my thoughts of the day.
Pardon me to whoever is reading my blog, that it doesn't have a real purpose. It is not an Islamic blog, it is just a blog to let my family know how i am doing here. It doesn't have a theme. Sometimes when an Islamic issue had to be address, there will be an Islamic entry. If theres teenage issues to be addressed (my two younger sisters, and 3 cousins are teenagers), i will write something about teenagers. But mostly it is about me missing food, missing the family, football, work and my strange encounters with dogs on the streets.
Anyway, very grateful to Suraya and her family to organise such a massive gathering. I was going thru the all the pictures again and again, saw some people who are close to my heart-my immediate family, my sisters, my aunts, my cousin, my uncles, and most of all, the picture of my Grand Ma and Grand Pa. Brought tears in my eyes. Just realised how much I miss them.
Tok Aki passed away while I was in Perth a few years ago undergoing my internship in the Curtin Aquatic Unit. I was doing some projects there, while learning the proper way of harvesting fish and marrons. He didn't want me to come home to see him. He wanted me to stay in Perth. The day he passed away, I was so tired, I asked to be excused from work. I went back to my hostel and fell asleep. While sleeping very deeply, I dreamt of someone who was very near me, and i can feel the comfort that the person brought along with him. I can't remember if the person hugged me, or spoke to me, but i remember he said Goodbye. When I woke up, I can still feel the comfort. I had such a good feeling. I have been there for about 5 weeks and I was far away from my family. I missed them, and at the same time I was calling home a lot to get some updates about Tok Aki. Then a few minutes after I woke up, I told my flatmate that I dreamt of someone, who brought peace and comfort to me. And i am still feeling it. I thought it was a dream of an angel. Then i got a phone call from my Uncle to deliver the news that Tok Aki just passed away. I know it is bizarre, but i think it was him in my dreams to say his goodbyes coz when i had that dream, it was about the same time.
Few weeks later I returned home to Singapore from Perth, met my family who was still mourning. Fazal was suffering from chicken pox, so he was at home. A week later mom said it was Tok Aki's 40th day anniversary. So, maybe i can say some extra prayers for him. That evening, I was on the phone with my friend. And from the corner of my ears, I heard familiar footsteps. It was the footsteps of my grand pa. He has this peculiar way of walking. He was always dragging his feet because they were weakened due to suffering from stroke years ago. So, whenever he walked, you could always hear his dry feet dragging on the marble floor. And I heard it. I turned around, and it was gone.
I guess, I missed him.
I am so happy to see Tok Darling happy in the Tok Zahab gathering. She is all I have now in that generation. I wish, I can come home to spend time with her and my family. The photos really made me sad. Being here, i sacrificed seeing my 3 cousins growing up, seeing my parents and my grand ma grow old, seeing my brother graduate. I can never get this time back. But i hope whatever little time i spend with them when I come home for holidays are well spent.
Mama, Dad, Adik, Tok Darling, Tok Aki, Abang Aish, Ateli ne ne (Fazli), Girl, Auntie Anim and Uncle Kader, Fatin, Shifaa and the latest addition: Nadya.....I miss you all. I really do. Today....theres tears in my eyes.....I really miss you all.
"I want to be swept off my feet. I want my children to have magical powers. I am prepared for amazing things to happen. I can handle it." -Anonymous
Pardon me to whoever is reading my blog, that it doesn't have a real purpose. It is not an Islamic blog, it is just a blog to let my family know how i am doing here. It doesn't have a theme. Sometimes when an Islamic issue had to be address, there will be an Islamic entry. If theres teenage issues to be addressed (my two younger sisters, and 3 cousins are teenagers), i will write something about teenagers. But mostly it is about me missing food, missing the family, football, work and my strange encounters with dogs on the streets.
Anyway, very grateful to Suraya and her family to organise such a massive gathering. I was going thru the all the pictures again and again, saw some people who are close to my heart-my immediate family, my sisters, my aunts, my cousin, my uncles, and most of all, the picture of my Grand Ma and Grand Pa. Brought tears in my eyes. Just realised how much I miss them.
Tok Aki passed away while I was in Perth a few years ago undergoing my internship in the Curtin Aquatic Unit. I was doing some projects there, while learning the proper way of harvesting fish and marrons. He didn't want me to come home to see him. He wanted me to stay in Perth. The day he passed away, I was so tired, I asked to be excused from work. I went back to my hostel and fell asleep. While sleeping very deeply, I dreamt of someone who was very near me, and i can feel the comfort that the person brought along with him. I can't remember if the person hugged me, or spoke to me, but i remember he said Goodbye. When I woke up, I can still feel the comfort. I had such a good feeling. I have been there for about 5 weeks and I was far away from my family. I missed them, and at the same time I was calling home a lot to get some updates about Tok Aki. Then a few minutes after I woke up, I told my flatmate that I dreamt of someone, who brought peace and comfort to me. And i am still feeling it. I thought it was a dream of an angel. Then i got a phone call from my Uncle to deliver the news that Tok Aki just passed away. I know it is bizarre, but i think it was him in my dreams to say his goodbyes coz when i had that dream, it was about the same time.
Few weeks later I returned home to Singapore from Perth, met my family who was still mourning. Fazal was suffering from chicken pox, so he was at home. A week later mom said it was Tok Aki's 40th day anniversary. So, maybe i can say some extra prayers for him. That evening, I was on the phone with my friend. And from the corner of my ears, I heard familiar footsteps. It was the footsteps of my grand pa. He has this peculiar way of walking. He was always dragging his feet because they were weakened due to suffering from stroke years ago. So, whenever he walked, you could always hear his dry feet dragging on the marble floor. And I heard it. I turned around, and it was gone.
I guess, I missed him.
I am so happy to see Tok Darling happy in the Tok Zahab gathering. She is all I have now in that generation. I wish, I can come home to spend time with her and my family. The photos really made me sad. Being here, i sacrificed seeing my 3 cousins growing up, seeing my parents and my grand ma grow old, seeing my brother graduate. I can never get this time back. But i hope whatever little time i spend with them when I come home for holidays are well spent.
Mama, Dad, Adik, Tok Darling, Tok Aki, Abang Aish, Ateli ne ne (Fazli), Girl, Auntie Anim and Uncle Kader, Fatin, Shifaa and the latest addition: Nadya.....I miss you all. I really do. Today....theres tears in my eyes.....I really miss you all.
"I want to be swept off my feet. I want my children to have magical powers. I am prepared for amazing things to happen. I can handle it." -Anonymous